Ninth

He had these paranoid eyes. They bulged out in stares. He was forever insisting on something or other, while speaking two or three times louder than anyone else. We listened to tales of travels that had taken him the length and breadth of England and into Scotland also.

He kept calling for drugs. He asked everyone if they had them or could get them and was undeterred, if not pissed off, by our reassurances that there were no drugs and would be no drugs. He appealed to facebook in vain and chased every lead. He repeatedly shook my friend's hand, saying "I know you think I'm a twat but I like you."

He left in a huff, shouting into a mobile phone. After he was gone, a far less ridiculous person, who he'd been hailing in a kind of conversation, realised that his phone was missing. For me, the identity of the thief was obvious, but I'm judgemental.