Sightly adapted news story:
PC madness today hit Christmas when health and safety spoilsports slapped a ban on Santa Claus, saying "We can no longer look away as people's lives are endangered in the name of tradition".
The Santa ban has already affected the St Aubrey Festive
Carnival, where the real Father Christmas who normally heads up the parade is being replaced by a glowing plastic imitation. This happened after
a ruling was made by moody bureaucrats.
One angry mum stormed: "They're getting rid of the magic," while her apoplectic partner raged "Where's it gonna end? Why won't they leave my dreams alone?"
Killjoys are grounding St Nic because of safety concerns, citing fireplace mishaps as the number one concern this Christmas. A mob of disgruntled parents are expected to confront health and safety nuts this evening.
"Common sense has gone out the window" cried one pitchfork-waving man.
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